Ripley Hands...

As some of you know, some of the effects of the last round of chemo had - well - rather unpleasant side effects. The first round did, too, come to think of it?  But...  The Taxol's neuropathy effects (the pins & needles thing) continued to increase even after treatment was done.  It got to the point a couple of weeks ago where Tracy's hands took on an Alien-esque look.  Sort of like you would be expecting something to come poking out of her skin.  Anyway - been trying to get this uploaded for a while and - maybe have succeeded.

(honestly - it has been a long time since I used an obscure movie reference - figured it was time - just to keep y'all on your toes...)

OK MY HANDS HURT

I've been blog silent as my neuropathy has been giving me a run for my money.  My hands literally have had a pulsating motion in them that I videoed on my cell to show my medical providers.  Bill was going to convert it so I could post against it but alas the conversion just wouldn't load.  Anyhoo, I am medically doing well, and the bumps in the road I have currently are difficult, but I am still counting my blessings.  I know so many others have tremendous struggles and mine will pass - just not fast enough for me.  I'll keep things short for a bit.  Thank you all so much for checking in, cards that just keep me laughing, beautiful spring flowers, powerful prayers and positive thoughts.  Plugging any holes that the pins and needles poke here on the seacoast.

It seems to me...

Near as I can tell, I get a whole lot more attachments for my $300 than the Big Boys provide for a price tag of somewhere north of $3,000,000.00



Mine



Theirs (not even a dough hook)



"What is the best day of the week to ask for donations for the fight against cancer? "

I would say - of course - "Everyday!"

Scott Joy, a friend, mentor, and supporter in the fight agaisnt Cancer, is looking for your support in helping others fight and beat cancer.   http://philly2011.livestrong.org/scottjoy

If you would, take a quick click, and do what you can do to help.  Tracy and I do what we can to support his work, and we pass this message along not as a solicitation, but as a heartfelt acknowledgement that through his efforts, others will be better off and will have a chance to live longer / fuller lives.

If nothing else, maybe you could pass along the link to Scott's website to others and maybe they will also be able to help - and pass the link to others??  Every bit helps, whether it's monetary or "just" the spreading of the word...

Ha - this is a serious post from me for a change!  But - it's a serious thing, this fight.  Help us help Scott help others.

Don't worry - I'll be back to my regular blogging tomorrow.. 

And now ... Page Three

Today began the third leg of our trek to wellness.  Surgery, Chemo, and now Radiation.

Ok, I have to be honest, I need to apologize for the affront on Americana  - but honestly – when I was trying to think of something to blog about regarding Radiation – the only thing I could think of was me and Tracy in a shiny little surrey with a fringe on top.  So - you have to hum this in your head to the title song of the R&H musical, Oklahoma!

Raaaadiation, where the ‘rays come zappin’ down the plain

And the neutron’s heat can sure feel neat

When the ‘lectrons ‘liminate the pain.

Ok(lahoma), I’ll stop now…

Ok – I generally get in trouble for doing this...

But here’s the obscure post for the week... I'll be surprised if I don't get summarily edited when Tracy looks at this tomorow.. 

“Hey – look!  I found another chapa’ai in the woods behind the house.  Where’s Teal’c  when you need him?

Weekend hijinks.

I’m sure you’ve all been wondering “where’s Bill been?”.  Well – I’ve been busy. So there.  My usual smidgeon of clever repartee may be less of a smidgeon for a while.  This week marks the beginning of another online semester for Boston University / Met College.  For the last – (wow) five years, I have been facilitating a Database Security class for several professors.  It makes for a long day.  Up at 3:45, online from 4 AM to 6:30 AM, then a quick shower (sharing, I know), then off to the office for my Day Job.  Sometime around 10 to 11 hours later, home, then supper fixin’s and another 3+ hours online answering questions, grading quizzes, discussions, assignments, etc.  Then off to bed around – 11 PM.  Don’t do the math, it’s not worth it..  I’ve done it, and it hurts.  But the uptake is that I get to interact with 10 to 15 new faces two or three times a year and can inculcate them (Bob – have Janet look that one up for you) with the latest and greatest in the world of Database Security.

So – we now have proof that Tracy, me, Taylor, and Jeremy were all in the same place at the same time.  Yes – I know there are only three cars, but honestly – do you think Tracy would be driving herself to Alstead!?!?  Not yet anyway.  The New York, Massachusetts, and New Hampshire contingents were all together. Yes - there really is that much snow on the ground up here.  Go figure.

In case you're wondering where this "middle of nowhere is", see below sort of about in the middle. The long skinny hair in the middle is a very, very muddy road...

Peace Of Mind

We got to spend the weekend with Jeremy and Taylor.  There is a place in the middle of nowhere we like to go.  We haven't been there - just the four of us - since the guys were little.  The silence of the woods is deafening and it promotes good sleep, good eating, good scrabble games, good puzzle making, good down time and peace of mind.  Having these two amazing young men with us refreshes our resolve as we fight the fight and face the next phase of treatment.  We know in our hearts the world still goes on and we are glad they are in it contributing to our peace of mind.  They know it 'cause we tell them all the time, and I'll say it here again - we are proud of them and love them very much.

Studying And Reclining

This body is doing a lot lately.  My brain has new meds to study.  Then I can't remember the information with my chemo brain so I have to relook up the information...  I have struggled this week so have not gotten off this note.  I have saved the draft twice.  Had two full weeks of work in the office and it knocked me back.  Heading into this week with the plan of preparing for the 7 week radiation schedule.  I'll do early mornings and head out in the late afternoon.  I have my fitness programs this week to help improve muscle atrophy and then on Friday meet with Dr Proux to give us the scoop on the rest of the story to the radiation road.  Getting to bed again early 'cause my body tells me so. 

Sunday Is A Day Of Rest And Smiles

I was in the office each day this week and I have to say it has set my body back a notch.  Taking the weekend to get enormous amounts of sleep and keep my feet up whenever possible.  Pins and needles are still on the rise for me in my hands and feet and causing me to limp at times with fatigue.  So this week I need to smarten up and do reasonable hours and stick with the program for healthy living.  Now if the rest of the world could cooperate and be more stress free it sure would go a long way to all of us living better.  So for now I will just make it my continued mission to stay healthy, stay focused on my care, and spread the phrase for the week - don't worry be happy!

If It's Tuesday It Must Be Another Emotional Transition

Bill and I met with Dr Hammond today.  Another amazing soul filling person who just keeps both of us going.  Tonight I just think of him and Sarah H and Heather and good tears come flowing.  How they have helped me/us through this process...  My labs came back in great shape and he confirmed I have the heart of a twenty year old.  We began to make plans for life after the red devil and taxol.  We had questions on how Avastin gets delivered for my next course, and do I need supplemental drugs with that infusion - yes.  Nuts.  I was hoping I would be one of the bodies that could cruise in and out for that infusion.  I still will require Benadryl so we are absorbing that piece.  My neuropathy has gained some momentum so keeping an extra eye on, and being mindful to report on, the newest observations with my hands, feet, nose and gums. This can last many many months and everyone is different.  There isn't a set timeframe for pins and needles to disappear and body parts to stop bleeding.  I ache to get back to the original Bill and Tracy and we talked with Dr Hammond about what my current body brings to the deal.  Bill's my guy and we explore all the new paths my battle takes us together.  I'm holding on tight to Bill and he feels good.  So if a few tears are shed along the way they just highlight the illness I left behind and the relief of having my husband and my medical team in my camp and taking me to great health. The next embrace is next week for radiation oncology.